My Little Superman

I just love these jammies.

He is just so darn cute in them!

My little Superman then grabbed a can of Pringles, crawled up in the recliner...

...and helped himself!

Look What I learned To Do with Photoshop!

An Update on Cooper

Cooper's surgery to put tubes in his ears was today. I was a nervous wreck, but everything went great! (Except him not being allowed to nurse after midnight.) I tried to get him to sleep


before he had to stop nursing, but it didnt happen. At about 1 AM, Jerry and I took him down the road in the car, and he feel asleep. We came back and I took him to bed. At about 3 AM, he woke up screaming for boob. It killed me to hold him and rock him while he screamed and pulled at my shirt, and I had to tell him no. It was awful. He stopped screaming just a couple minutes before we left at 5 AM. He wasn't asleep when we got to Hardees so I wouldn't let Jerry stop to get anything to eat. So I had about an hour and a half of sleep and an empty stomach.

This is in our room. The nurses brought him some toys.

This is after he had some medicine to make him loopy. It makes the separation easier. Atleast for him.

This is in the pre-op room. His medicine had really kicked in.

This is in recovery. They gave him a bottle :/

Mommy was so happy to see her little man!

He was so medicated, he didn't care about the bottle!

When the doctor called to let me know it was over, he said that everything went great. His ears were clear, which is the best time to do tubes. He didn't have to do his adnoids, which is what I was most worried about. He also told me he was waving at everyone as he feel asleep. That is just like Cooper :)

He slept the whole way home, and then we layed down together. He woke up at 6 PM, and then feel back asleep just a little while ago. He doesn't act like he is in any pain though! I just hope this works and stops his ear infections.

Tomorrow is the Day...

Cooper's ear surgery is tomorrow. He will be having tubes put in. They called this morning and we are to be ate the hospital at 6:45 AM. After midnight tonight, he cannot nurse. That will probably be the hardest part on him. Until 5 AM, he can have clear liquids, but that won't be what he wants! Maybe I will get lucky and he will stay asleep tonight...

I'm a nervous wreck right now. I'm dreading it, but I know its for the best. I will try to update tomorrow to tell you how it goes, but I make no promises because I don't know how he will be feeling. We would really appreciate your prayers :)

Our "Spring" Outing

On Friday, Cooper and I went to the park with K and B2. We had so much fun!

This was Cooper's favorite! A buden buden of course!

He loved the slide!

They played well together!

He insisted that I let him climb the very tall slide's steps by himself. With Mommy right behind him of course! And then we went down the slide together :)

That afternoon we visited a local ice cream shop, where Cooper goy his very first baby cone! He did great eating by himself! Just a few drops on his shirt!

Just Some Random Pictures...

...that I wanted to share with you!

I love this! He looks so sweet!

Rocks must taste really good because he tries to eat them everytime we step outside!

He absolutely loves his swing! Can you tell??

This is what he does if you ask him to make a face. Precious, right?

This outfit was Jerry's when he was Cooper's age. It looks adorable on Cooper!

I will try to get a picture of Jerry in it to show you for comparison but I make no promises :)



He loves anything with wheels. He is all boy!

Cooper's First Haircut!

Cooper recently got his first haircut. I had a hard time saying goodbye to his newborn hair, but around his ears was looking pretty pitiful.

This was taken prior to the cutting.

He really didn't mind it at all.

"What are they doing to me Dad??"

He gets a sucker for being such a brave little boy!

(that's a great face on me right?)

He thought he was such a big boy!

Looks like my baby is growing up!

Anxiety... and lots of it!

Since I was a sophomore in high school I have had panic attacks. I start crying (sometimes for no reason at all) and soon I can't breathe at all. Sometimes I will pass out, but most of the time I can get it under control before that happens.

I was on medicine prior to getting pregnant with my first baby and for the first few weeks of the pregnancy because I didn't know that I was pregnant. I believe this may have been part of the reason I lost that baby, but I don't know. I blamed myself because of it. I never resumed medication after I miscarried.

After Cooper was born, I got postpartum depression; his traumatic birth, not sleeping, and my history of anxiety were probably contributing factors. I had a really bad panic attack in the it hospital when Cooper was 2 days old. The nurses put the oxygen saturation thingy (yes that is a technical term) on me when the attack was almost over and it was only 80%. When it was almost over! This (and not sleeping) caused me to have to spend another night in the hospital instead of taking my baby boy home. My doctor prescribed Zoloft and I was to take it until he was at least 6 months old.

When he was around 6 months old I forgot to get my prescription filled for about a week. When i remembered I realized I hadn't had it for a whole week and I felt fine! So I decided not to get it filled. I did fine. No major panic attacks. Only a couple minor ones in a span of about 5 months.

Now everything has changed. Since January, I am a full time student and along with that comes some major stress. Add to that being a wife and mother and its almost too much. Since I started school my anxiety has gotten progressively worse. I knew I had my yearly check up scheduled for this week, and planned on discussing this with her. Not a moment to soon. This past week I have had a breakdown just about everyday. Little things set me off. I feel like there is a huge weight on my chest that just won't go away. I discussed this with my doctor yesterday and she asked if I got any time by myself just for me besides school. No. Jerry works thirds so he is rarely available to even help with Cooper. It's difficult to make the time to do the work for my online classes because of our conflicting schedules. This really stresses me out. I make good grades. Its just who I am. And so far I have made good grades; they just aren't as good as I would like. She said that absolutely going back on my Zoloft would be a good thing. She also suggested that I take some time for myself. Easier said than done. Also, she suggested that I get more active, such as taking Cooper on a walk or something like that. This is easier. Cooper loves to swim and my grandparents, who live next door, have a pool. I have a feeling we will be in the pool everyday. Now it just needs to get warm so we can get out there!

I will update you on how all this goes. I feel much better now that I have gotten it out.

On a brighter note, I lost 5 pounds!

Our Aquarium Trip

At the end of February, my friend K and I took our boys, B2 and Cooper to a local aquarium. Here are some of the highlights.

This is one of those bubble things in the middle of a tank. Both boys loved it!

This is the only picture of Cooper and I together I got. I'm always behind the camera. Its quite blurry, but since it is the only one I am sharing it. Look at that smile!

Aren't they sweet?!

He was fascinated! Way too busy to look at the camera!

If you look close you can see me holding B2 up. I did for both boys.

We really enjoyed the trip! I highly recommend it if you have a local aquarium to visit!

Last Wedding Post!

Our beautiful cake that my cousin made us for free!

The groom's cake also made by a cousin! I loved this cake! It was so creative!


I begged him not to smear cake all over me...

...he didn't listen!

I hope you have enjoyed all the pictures from my wedding!

Wedding Pictures: Continued

Jerry and the wedding party

The flower girl, my cousin S

The ring bearer, my cousin, S's brother, T



5 generations(including Cooper of course):
Nana, Me and Cooper, Granny, and Mom



Nana, cousin D, Aunt B, my photographer Lacey, and me
I am holding a baby quilt my great grandmother, Granny, hand quilted for Cooper. She gave it to me after the wedding. Cooper used it everyday his first winter. This winter he had outgrown it slighty but he still loves to cuddle with it!

More Wedding Pictures!!!

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Surgery Looms

We saw the Ear, Nose, and Throat doctor last Thursday. He did a pressure test, check Cooper's ears, tried to look in his mouth, made him scream, etc. He recommended putting tubes in his ears. I have scheduled the surgery for March 23.

I have mixed feelings about the surgery. On one hand, I know it will probably help Cooper and result in less trips to the doctor and help him not have to use antibiotics as much. I also know there is very little risk involved in this procedure. On the other hand, Cooper is my baby and they will be taking him from me. He will have to be put to sleep, and I really don't like that. He won't be allowed to nurse the night before. We are both going to hate that. How will I get him to sleep?? And even with routine procedures there is always some risk. What if he is in the .000001% that something goes wrong with??

Then there is the adenoids. The doctor also mentioned maybe removing his adenoids. He won't know if he recommends that or not until Cooper is already asleep and he can get a good look at the back of his throat. The tubes I think I can handle but removing something?? I don't know about that. Dr. L said there is very little risk of bleeding with it. But there is cutting involved so there is risk, right?? Plus I'm sure there is risk of infection like with any surgery.

Maybe I'm just worried because he is my baby and I am his mommy and that's my job. But either way, we would really appreciate your prayers about this.

A Peek at Spring!

The past two days have been very warm! Like spring! We have played outside a lot and I just had to show you a peek into Cooper's spring wardrobe! I absolutely love this outfit!

He was super sleepy and refused to nap. Can you tell??

This was my Tonka truck when I was little. He LOVES it!

SHIPPED!

I just checked my order status on Dell(because I'm anxious and have checked just about everyday except yesterday since I ordered it) and found out my laptop shipped yesterday and will be here tomorrow! I can barely stand the anticipation! HAHA

This means that pictures will be coming for you later this week! Pictures of my wedding and pictures of the trip Cooper and I took with K and B2. You remember them, right? There will also be pictures of my blown up lasagna and its aftermath.